Tuesday 29 April 2008

Public Enemy: The Musical

I've moved back to Public Enemy. I didn't think I'd ever write that idea again. But I'm on fire at the moment. I'm mixing Drama, Music and Poetry together to create an audio masterpiece. Or at least I hope so anyway. I haven't completely given up on The Hunter. I found that easier to write than Public Enemy. But my heart's not really in it.

Although I hope to finish both of them soon. I'm not writing as much as I like too. I'm being very, very lazy at the moment. I've only done 4 pages and I started it three days ago. It's going very, very slowly. I would love to pick up my pace as I really want to finish it quickly and get it sent off.

But that seems unlikely at the moment. It'll probably take me a couple of months to do. And I'm worried that 2008 will be like 2007 in that I hardly finish anything. I don't want that to happen. I want to be published in some form or another this year. And the way things are looking at the moment that doesn't seem likely to happen either.

ARGHHHHH!!!

I'm enjoying writing it. It's different. And fun. If a little hard.

Tuesday 22 April 2008

Harder than I thought

Red October has proved harder than I thought. And I've given up on it. I know, it didn't take me long. But I just can't be bloody bothered with it. Instead, I have decided to do my Hunter idea as a radio drama. I will throw in some musical numbers and I think I have a masterpiece.

I was going to go back to Theatre but I've run out of ideas. I wanted to do my fantasy play Dark Omen but only managed 3 lines of story. Ah well...

Here's to the Hunter. Something I will probably give up on with a few hours.

4 years ago

It's been four years since I was arrested for malicious communication and harassment of Catherine Redfern. I spent 12 months on probation and got a £120 fine.

I would just like to say... FUCK YOU CATHERINE!!

I'LL KILL YOU, BITCH!!

Tuesday 15 April 2008

Red October

I've decided to abandon my Messiah Novel. And once again return to Jodie Summers. I guess Science-Fiction and Detective mixture isn't the sort of genre I'm interested in. I'm more of a spy-thriller person. And that's exactly what I'm going to write. No, not Public Enemy. I'm almost certainly gone off that forever now.

But a new spy-thriller called Red October. It's along similar lines as the Metal Gear Solid video-games. No wait, It's a complete and total rip-off of the Metal Gear Solid video-games. It stars my favourite character Jodie Summers! Yay! She's back!

I have the general gist of the story written down. And I'll start writing it tomorrow. I'm hoping my interest can keep up long enough for me to finish it. I am so desperate to finish something! Arghhh!! I thought Messiah was it. But it wasn't. I thought Public Enemy was it. But wasn't. And now I'm hoping Red October is it. But probably won't be.

It'll be crap. And never finished.

Sigh.

Please, somebody kill me.

Monday 14 April 2008

Despair and Turmoil

Things have gone wrong. I knew they would. My Messiah novel isn't as good as I first thought it was. In fact, it's damn right dreadful. I'm in turmoil, and in total despair. I managed to finish off the first chapter yesterday. It's 6500 words long. Which is quite good for 4 days work. But it's absolutely terrible. I hate myself.

Friday 11 April 2008

Smells like Prodigy spirit

Another good day again today. I am so happy! I managed 1700 words of my Messiah Novel. And I have to admit. It's looking pretty good so far. That's 3300 in total. I'm doing good. And I am so proud of myself. I didn't think I could do it. But I have. All I need now is for this good spell to continue and finish the novel and get it published!

But I doubt any of that will happen. Something will go wrong. I won't finish. And it'll be so crap people will laugh at it. But for now, though I feel good. I was once again, determined to have a good day. And I'll keep being determined to have good days because right now, it seems to be working! Yay!

I'm really enjoy writing this novel. It's fun to do. It'll be some of the toughest writing I'll ever have to do. With all kinds of action sequences. But if I believe in myself (which I haven't recently) then I'm sure I can conquer it.

Keep your fingers crossed!

Thursday 10 April 2008

Messiah lives!

I've decided to rewrite my old, crappy, cyberpunk novel Messiah. I've changed the story from being about evil feminists to being about evil aliens. That way it'll have a better chance of being published if I ever finish it. I managed 29,813 words of the old draft and I'm hoping to surpass that and actually finish the bloody thing!

The book stars my favourite, Prodigy (Amy Anderson), and she's basically the Messiah that will save Earth, and other parallel Earths from these evil aliens creature type things. It's very inspired by The Matrix. Well, I mean, it's a complete rip-off of the Matrix movies. I've managed 1387 words so far. Not bad for 2 days work. I'm trying to write between 1000 - 1800 words a day. I've managed 800 words so far today. And I plan to do another 200-400 to finish off a pretty decent day.

I am determined to start having some good days. I'm getting sick of everything going wrong for me. I'm sick of failing at everything. I'm gonna try and do my best to write something that's publishable. 

Fingers crossed.

Tuesday 8 April 2008

Stuck

I am really stuck at the moment. I don't have a clue what I should write. I have loads of ideas but I don't really feel passionate about them enough to undertake the long arduous process of writing them.

I've got to do something! I can't just sit on my arse and do nothing! But what!? I managed a page of The Hunter comic on Saturday but since them I haven't written anything. I am completely confused. I have ideas about The Hunter but the passion isn't there. I just don't know what I am going to do.

I wish I was dead. Then I wouldn't have to worry about anything. That would be so sweet. But I don't have the methods to kill myself which makes things even more frustrating. If only I had a gun, or drugs or rope or something! Ahhhhhh!!!

I'll need to undertake a deep session of thinking. It may take a while but hopefully at the end it I will have an idea of what to write. But knowing me it'll be crap and I'll never end up finishing it.

Life blows.

Thursday 3 April 2008

Been lazy

I haven't written Tuesday or Wednesday as I was feeling tired. I reread what I had written with Public Enemy and I came to the conclusion that it was total shite. So I'm feeling deeply depressed. I have cried a few times and given some thought to what I should do.

I've decided to abandon Jodie. And instead write my other favourite character Prodigy. But she is so versatile that I can't decide what to do her as. Detective, Vigilante, Messiah, Mercenary etc. She works in just about anything! So I have so long hard thinking to do. I want to write comics. I really do. But I find the whole thing incredibly hard. I don't know why though. Maybe it's because I'm just an untalented idiot.

I tried a vigilante novel today called The Hunter. Which stars Prodigy as the lead character. But it didn't go well at all. I am just to obsessed with writing comics at the moment. But I suck at them. Well, I suck at pretty much every form of writing. I am really, really upset. But I decided to buy some books to see if they could help me. I brought PANEL ONE and PANEL TWO that features top comic scripts by writers.

I'm hoping that I can learn from them. I'm hoping that seeing how other writers write their scripts could help me. I hope so anyway. But I won't get my hopes up.